Sorrow of the Irretrievable

Last week made me realise that being human is painful. We grow and grow and suddenly lose all the innocence and charm which we possess since the day we are born. Things which you viewed from a different perspective when your brain didn't know that there existed an angle closer to reality and harshness, suddenly become prominent or even become obscure. The sweet smell of new school bags is what you have stopped experiencing. The rain drops though still pleasurable have now become droplets of naturally distilled water. You feel sad when you know that you cannot prance around in the school corridors, visit the staffroom with bundles of notebooks or even call the walls of your school your very own! You cannot be obstinate with your demands. Your questions no longer have those genuine curiosity attached. Your likings suddenly turn into obsessions or you stop liking something altogether. You now know that when somebody praises you he or she might even despise you.
You are suddenly old enough to stop doing things and to start new things. The feeling that you are no longer in that phase of life where you did nothing but dream hurts you. It is shocking when you see that people who are almost as old as you have started taking important decisions in life, career, etc. You are about to become a graduate and are planning your post graduation course without even thinking actively about it. The day your school bade farewell to you is still fresh in your memory and now it is time to face similar situations. You admire a person you know and presto! You are as old as he or she is. School going kids start appearing younger when you have hardly stopped associating yourself with terms like uniform, Value Education and recess. And wouldn't it be shocking if it suddenly struck you that next year you wouldn't even be a teenager. You will enter the Twenties! You will be completing two decades on this planet! Your responsibilities would or wouldn't increase but your talks become graver. You are about to prepare yourself to plunge into this infinity called life.
And Children's Day made me mull over the issue. Do I qualify to celebrate Children's Day? Have I crossed the thin line? Am I not someone's child even if I am nineteen? When is the umbilical cord with childhood cut by 'the unknown paediatrician'? What defines the end of your golden years? Why is life irreversible?